Have you ever noticed when you get in an elevator, strangers optimize space between them.  You get in, press your number and step to the back corner of the elevator.  Next person gets in, hits their number and steps to the back opposite corner.  As more people enter, space is optimized by people standing as far away as possible from each other.  Knowing this is the norm of human behavior, sometimes, I shake it up.  I'll get in, push my button and stand dead center in the elevator.  It's fun to see what happens next!  Ah, Patrick the Disruptor! 

In the field of Nonverbal Communication, the study of space is called Proxemics.  When I took my graduate course in nonverbal communication, I was fascinated by … well … EVERYTHING!  One HUGE takeaway from that course was an acute awareness about       space.

Our use of space fills two opposing human needs:  Affiliation or Privacy.

If we seek...

Feeling like you don't know where you're going?  Your future looks unclear.  Every day you take steps, but maybe you're not sure if you're going forward, backward, sideways or upside down!  Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland says, “If you don't know where you want to go, then it doesn't matter which path you take."  Aaargh!  If you're feeling frustrated about your path, you CARE and it MATTERS which way you go, right?!?

It's SO IMPORTANT to have purpose or mission or goal.  What is yours?  Look beyond that promotion or raise or that next milestone on your project.  What is your Big Life Goal?  What is the legacy you want to leave?  What is your Life Gift? 

Maybe you want to create a movement to empower the disempowered.  Maybe you want to stop bullying.  Maybe you want to raise your children with solid and unique character.  Whatever your mission or purpose, clarity provides a compass for life.

When you...

The words ignorant and ignorance are thrown around today – usually in a derogatory way to demean someone who doesn't agree with us.  Sad.  Webster dictionary says ignorance is the lack of knowledge, education or awareness.  For me, the term ignorance runs deeper than merely a lack of knowledge, education or awareness.  The root of the word ignorance is to ignore.  If we ignore something, we are aware of it, but we choose NOT to admit we are aware of it.  So, ignorance isn't a lacking, it's a CHOICE!

Ow!

Where does our Ignorance show up?  Where do we CHOOSE to not admit we are aware of something?  Perhaps we are being ignorant about poverty in the world.  Issues in our country or our city or even in our neighborhood!  Perhaps we are choosing to be ignorant about the difficulties around the world.  Maybe we are aware of political turmoil in our world, but the problems seem SO BIG we do nothing and continue our lives, hoping...

You Just WON the Lottery!  Magic!  Those five words are the stuff that DREAMS are made of, right?  Probably gives you a bit of an emotional rise to even THINK about it.  Right now, think of 3 things you would DO if you won a BIG lottery.   Skip the tactical stuff about getting a lawyer and an accountant.  And skip the stuff you would buy.  What would you DO?

I got in the front seat of the taxi in Winnipeg.  The two Senior Managers working for me popped into the back seat for our short ride to the client.  It was a damp and cold January morning.  Instead of preparing for the day's meetings and the deliverables needed for the week, I posed this question:  what would you do if you won $10M dollars?  They excitedly talked about all the stuff they would buy, but I kept probing with 'so, what's next?'  More stuff bought.  It didn't take them long to joyously announce, they would FINALLY quit this tough, challenging...

I heard my name and applause from 450 people.  The moment has arrived.  I smile broadly, walk to the edge of the stage.  Pick up the gizmo that flips slides.  I walk up the four steps marked with red tape on their edges….and take a long deep breathe.  I wait at the back corner of the stage until the audience quiets down until you could hear a whisper.  PAUSE.  I take one step forward…

It's not every day that we get an opportunity to speak to a crowd, to share our wisdom.  It's exciting.  It gets your blood flowing.  Your endorphins pumped.   Most importantly, addressing people from stage is a privilege.   An opportunity to spend one hour to change a life….maybe in a big way.  Maybe in a subtle way.  Either way, we serve.

This story, though, is about the journey before that first step on the stage.  It's about the hour and a half before.

Before any big speaking engagement, I get...

Today's the last day of 2018.  CONGRATULATIONS!   Another year completed!  How do you feel today?  Refreshed?  Invigorated?  Tired?  Glad that the year is closing?  Looking forward to a fresh start?

I'm often conflicted on 'special' days like New Year's.  On one hand, what a great mindset shift to assemble our brains around something new and exciting that happens today.  On the other hand, what makes this day any more special than any other.  Not to downplay the specialness of the day, but why not UP-PLAY every Day? 

Its December 31^st.  What a GREAT day to talk about deadlines!  Did you set a New Year's Resolution a year ago?  Did you make it happen? 

The word DEADLINE isn't an uplifting word, is it?  Death and Lines.  Well, it's not far from the truth! 

Definition:  DEADLINE – a line drawn within or around a prison that a prisoner passes at the risk of being shot.

Say...

I asked my daughter to recommend a topic to write about this week and she suggested Family Time.  On so many levels, this is an appropriate topic!  It’s the holidays!  Whether we spend time with our actual blood family or our ‘friends as family,’ the holiday season is specifically purposed for Family Time.

As I think of the holidays and I anticipate spending time with family and friends, words pop into my head.  Which words describe your Family Time?  
Excitement.  Connection.  Discovery.  Agony.  Playful.  Contentedness. Excruciating.  Joy.  Smiles.  Wonder.  Strain.  Stress.  Treats.  Wisdom.  Ceremony.  Peace.  Tired.  Playful.

Gee, did I say Playful twice?  Yep, you guessed it....that’s my word!  Is that my word because Playful comes my way during this holiday season?  

Sometimes.  

Mostly Playful is my word because that’s...

"Your call is important to us.  Please stay on the line and your call will be answered in the order it was received.  You estimated wait time is BLANK."

You know this line so well you began reciting it before you finished reading it.  It's used so often that it's turned into a cultural meme!  Question:  If you are as important as they say, how come no one answers when you call?  Do you feel important after hearing that statement?  Do you feel de-prioritized?  marginalized?  left alone? 

You made the call because it's important to you.  …and you wait.  2 minutes?  8 minutes?  23 minutes? 

Cyber-limbo. 

Blank space or even worse….holding music.  Someone PLEASE pick up.  Frustration creeps in.  It builds into a grumble, then a Roar!  

AARGH!!!! 

Now that you've got that all-too-familiar feeling deeply ingrained in your body memory, let's talk about YOUR...

The Titanic Belfast exhibition is a stunning tribute in the Belfast shipyards to the 1505 people lost and 703 survivors from the Titanic Disaster.  Walking through the exhibition, you ride emotions of excitement, pride in craftsmanship, in awe of the majestic ships of the era …. and feelings of sadness and shame, as well. 

The man who discovered the sunken ship, Robert Ballard, described their discovery.  After months of search, they found it.  Cheers of jubilation crossed the ship….for about 90 seconds.  Then, a solemn silence … realizing they discovered a graveyard. 

In my search to share wisdoms, I traveled to Belfast to learn about the Titanic.  Only one fateful night separated the meaning of 'Titanic' from World Class to Epic Disaster.  What happened and how can we learn from it?  Next year I'm conducting a seminar in Belfast, The Titanic Diagnostic:  Are you Steaming Towards World Class Success or Epic...

Recently I took a trip to Ireland to scout locations for my 2 events next year.  I visited Ireland a few times before which is EXACTLY why I chose to return.  

Why?

I've heard people say we are headed into a difficult financial period.  I’m no economist, financial adviser or soothsayer.  However, I will prepare myself and others for potential bumps, potholes or just huge sinkholes in the road ahead.

My experience of the Irish people is that they are immensely RESILIENT!  And that’s the primary theme for my event next year:  Facing Turbulent Times — Learning from Irish Resilience.

I could go on and on about Irish resilience century over century, but my story begins with a young woman named Ellen Hurley.  I’m our family genealogist and her name appears in the family tree.  Her story, though, hit a particular chord for me when I visited her home town of Tralee in 2014.

Ellen Hurley boarded a boat to the United States to...